Today morning I noticed a passing general remark about one of my book, made by
a person without actually reading that book or without knowing much about that
book. This acted as a kind of stimulus for my machine (my ordinary mechanical self) to
react to, and created within an emotional disturbance.
At the same time, there occurred a process of inner direct seeing, how an automatic response arises in the machine against the stimulus that comes in the moment, and that it is not mandatory to be one with that believing that mechanical re-action to be 'real'. There was a clear choice either to fall to that re-action or to choose to be under the energy of 'impression' that was coming through the third state of consciousness.
However, there is no question of being negative or judgmental toward that person, as G. I. Gurdjieff says, one does thing believing it to be true (though it may not be true in reality), and no one does anything deliberately that he believes as wrong.
Then, that emotional disturbance got surrounded by the consciousness, and
that disturbance silently melted into the consciousness and the entire thing
(surrounding consciousness and that emotional disturbance) became something
different, became a whole, leaving no trace of disturbance or judgment behind.
It is one thing to put a thought or 'Work I' against inner disturbance and 'buffer' it, or to improve or make the response of one’s machine better and
more appropriate from the utilitarian point of view (often it is necessary, and
which the modern education systems and usual self-improvement techniques do),
but it is quite another thing to be separate and detached from the response of
one’s machine.
The work on 'ceasing to be a machine' begin with the readiness to face the discomfort,
and with the direct and clear inner seeing and separating from one's mechanical
reaction and choosing to be under the energy of 'impression' that is coming through the
third state of consciousness in the moment. And then, accepting that
disturbance as a part of oneself and letting it to melt into the whole (all
encompassing bigger "I"). This process is a beginning of the transformation, it is like experiencing observed and observer as one as J. Krishnamurti says. It weakens machine's ability to re-act and strengthens the ability of that
bigger "I" to prevail.
Eventually, after a long time, when this practice becomes one's way of life, one ceases to be a machine, one 'dies' and makes the way for the 're-birth'. I have personally experienced that there exist persons in whom no mechanical reaction arise against any stimulus (beyond any need of transformation) and there always flow a stream of love and compassion irrespective of the nature of the stimulus being confronted.
- 17/05/2018
